It's Good To Want Things

how about some other news?

2009-11-09T22:42:45Z

So today I went in for my Gestational Diabetes test.....or as I keep calling it, the GD test. (Yeah, I know...ha ha.)

I have been anxious about this and for awhile, I figured it was because I didn't want to have to change the way that I eat. I mean, I'm pregnant- I am SUPPOSED to have the occasional doughnut or milkshake or whatever.

But the more I really thought about it and really reflected on it, the more I realize that part does not bother me.

What really has me anxious is that THAT test was what started me on the road to a c-section with Jackson. If it wasn't for the GD, I would not have seen Dr Al-Malt, I would not have been induced, I would not have been given (as much) pitocin, and I would not have ended up with the section.

I would have been "allowed" to go into labor naturally.

And it's a test I can't study for or prep for or cheat on or anything....it just is what it is. Nothing can change at this point. I am just waiting for the results right now. I know most of the people who actually do read this probably don't do a lot of praying, but if you do, say a little prayer for me that the results will come back negative for GD.

Days 4, 5, and 6

2009-11-09T03:11:06Z

Well, we had a setback on day 4- the oven basically broke. Which left us a microwave-only family. Which meant that the meal I planned wasn't really going to work. We made it work, to quote Tim Gunn.

On day 5, Kirk fixed the oven. YAY! But we had a situation we had to deal with and that caused us to be "out and about" for a LONG time and we were all starving...so we got fast food for lunch. But the rest of the day went well....eating what we have!

Day 6- Hmmm. Well, we knew that it would be an "off" day, because the plan was to celebrate Jackson's Godfather's birthday and we were at Downtown Disney. We ended up spending $10 at the Lego Store- not too bad. And we went to the Earl of Sandwich for lunch. (And we had woken up late, so none of us had eaten ANYTHING yet and we were all famished.)

Can I just say that for having to spend money and suspend the experiment, it was TOTALLY 100% WORTH IT! This was the best meal EVER! I had the All American Sandwich and a bowl of Tomato soup....holy hell, that was the best tomato soup ever made. And the sandwich? F-ing awesome. I had half at lunch and the other half at dinner. And really it was less than $25 for the 3 of us to eat at Downtown Disney, so it was a pretty great value. (And we could have saved about $3 had I not splurged on the frozen lemonade and had we just shared a bag of chips...we didn't even open the 2nd bag til I ate dinner, anyway.)

By the time we got home, though, we were all just exhausted. It was just an off day all around...so for dinner, Kirk got $5 pizza and then we planned to go to Publix for some groceries. (Of course as we start this project, we ran out- completely OUT- of several items that we need- mayonnaise, plastic wrap, veg oil, etc. Plus we needed to get eggs and apple juice for my Gestational Diabetes test tomorrow morning. I chose apple hoping that the slightly lower glycemic index would help....it was either that or Orange juice.)

So we spent $40 at Publix. But that's not too bad. Especially considering that was "A LOT" of stuff that we needed.

Overall- we kinda fell off the wagon, but not terribly so....and we are hopping back on again tomorrow. Let's see how the next week goes?

Day 3....and no big whoop

2009-11-05T16:32:38Z

Here we are on Day 3 of our experiment. Still doesn't feel any different, which is GREAT! When I did go to Publix, I actually spent less than $10. (We needed milks, I splurged on some on-sale yogurt, we got bread free cause it rang up wrong and the sauce needed for dinner tomorrow night.)

Last night's meal ended up being better than expected because the Orange Chicken was actually 2 individual meals- with green beans and sweet potatoes and the sweet potatoes were REALLY good. The beans were okay and the chicken was nice and tender. I just added some jasmine rice. Makes me wonder why we hadn't already eaten them! They were good.

Tonight it's a normal meal, chicken and rice and green beans. Of course, for some reason, I have not been able to cook chicken like I used to. It might be because the new stovetop is hotter than my old 60s stovetop? I don't know. Tonight I am going to try REALLY hard not to burn everything.

In other news, Mom is bringing the DVD recorder to the house so that we can get the stuff off the DVR (I would not really care except that we have something on there saved from FOUR YEARS ago...our mini video from the wedding was featured as the Wedding of the Week on Central FL Wedding TV and yes, of course, I taped it. I would really hate to lose that.)

As soon as we have that transferred, we are taking the box in and canceling the cable and phone service. I admit it's going to be a bit liberating. I can't just mindlessly turn on the TV *and* we have the added bonus of solicitors not calling us! (Of course, now I will have to be extra vigilant about keeping my phone charged!)

Speaking of which, there's my cell! Gotta run!

Day 2

2009-11-04T14:07:15Z

So here we are on Day 2 of project "empty the pantry" and tonight's meal is to be Orange Chicken with Rice and Broccoli. (Have to double check and make sure the broccoli is still edible...been in the fridge awhile!)

I thought about making the first few weeks not so exciting...ya know, saving the "good stuff" for later on when we are bored with our choices. But I think that using the best of what we have now and whittling away at the supply will also force me to get more creative as time goes on. We shall see, that's for sure.

i love my chiropractor

2009-10-19T03:45:22Z

Oy vey...the back pain I have had this pregnancy has been killer. One day I could not even walk! I know it's partly due to having a toddler to chase around and not being able to "take it easy" when I feel I should.

So I bit the bullet and paid a lump sum for a chiropractic package. I found someone who deals with pregnancy and would even come out to the home birth to do adjustments to help along labor! And basically, she has a pregnancy package so that I don't pay the standard rate each time I come in....I get 8 adjustments during the 2nd trimester and 12 during the 3rd. (Which may end up carrying over to post-baby?)

And while I have never been to a chiro before and my hubby thinks it's a bunch of quackery, I could not be happier. I basically told hubby to stuff it because he doesn't know what it feels like and this woman has magic hands. (There were days I was seriously having trouble breathing and she did an adjustment and I felt like my lungs gained an extra 50% capacity...awesome!)

I have finally done it.....

2009-09-26T02:01:03Z

I have joined twitter. It really started because I wanted to follow @shitmydadsays cause he is teh funny.

Holla if you twitter! I am conversegrrl because I tried a bajillion other names and they were all taken. I felt like Forrest Gump on the school bus on his first day of school. Sigh.

today was tough

2009-09-11T03:13:20Z

Ugh! So last night I could not get to sleep because of my allergies. So I got up and did the whole Neti Pot thing, proceeded to sneeze a bit more, and finally got to sleep around 3:15am.

Then Jax woke at 6:45am (had to go down the stairs to set him back down and give him a "binky sock")

Then he woke at 7:45am (see above)

Then the phone rang at 8:30am and I was like "OMG ppl, my alarm does not go off for FIFTEEN minutes!" Then my cell rang.

And Jackson was up.

Whatever, okay. We ran our errand, ran to the playdate, got ready for swim class, and then headed out. When swimming was done, we got in the car AND THE BATTERY WAS DEAD.

To quote Kirk, "MOTHER PUSS BUCKET!"

So we had to walk home. At 1pm in the 90+ degree weather. I had cork wedge shoes on. Thank goodness the swim lessons are about 1/3 of a mile from home. BUT STILL!

I call do-over!
Now my car is at the dealership because the battery is still under warranty so let's hope it is that and not, say, the starter or the alternator. We will be walking to the swim lessons tomorrow.

OMG people calm down!

2009-09-05T03:00:12Z

Why is it that a President speaking to students about education being important and taking personal responsibility for your commitment to education is a BAD thing?

Honestly, I am repulsed by the fact that people ASSume that Obama will be discussing socializing the country or whatever other nonsense they keep spouting. Folks, he is there to talk about EDUCATION being GOOD. And you know what? The White House is making the EXACT speech available online on Monday for everyone to ~~read over~~ nitpick and scream about.

If I had a child in school today, and W was making this type of speech, I would have NO problem with it. (I would hope that he wouldn't ad-lib, and just stick to the speech because he was notorious for his atrocious grammar. But I would not have a problem with him giving the speech.)

swimming lessons

2009-08-31T21:19:36Z

So Jackson is really enjoying his lessons...even though he sometimes cries. I know that sounds odd. But every day he wakes up wanting to know when we will go to the pool. Sunday he even walked to the baby gate (by the garage door) and was pulling at it, saying "pool" and "shoes on" and "get in car". So I do know that he likes going.

And after the lesson, he is all smiles.

Today he floated all by himself! The teacher didn't have a hand on him!
(There is a sweet little girl whose lessons are sometimes before ours...she doesn't seem to have a set time? Anyway, this girl started the same day Jackson did and she just wails during the lessons. It's heartbreaking for me, and I don't even know the girl! I am so thankful that Jackson just does a whimper-cry thing and not the whole time. Otherwise, I don't know how long I could take it.)

scrapbooking

2009-08-29T16:10:17Z

Ah, it's nice to finally pull out my scrapbooking supplies and get back to it. It's been ages since I did that. And it felt wonderful. I got a few spreads done....pretty good for a 4 hour timeframe.

I even signed up for the next crop in 2 weeks. Cropping in a store was really nice cause I didn't feel the need to buy everything- just what I needed for my pages! So I got a few pieces of paper and well, I caved and got the clearance felt pack too. Didn't use those yet, but they are called "rough and tumble" and are for boy pages and I obviously will use them. Dinosaurs, rocket ships, robots- totally cool!

Also, I saw the shuttle launch last night. As we were leaving the parking lot, we pulled over and watched it. It was awesome...got to keep it in sight for at least five full minutes....the longest I have ever seen one!

cookie time!

2009-08-22T02:32:35Z

So Jackson and I made cookies (LOTS of them) with the new Cookie Press and wow is it awesome! I also used the new cookie sheet and didn't think it would make a difference but it DID!

I guess if the sheet pan is too thick, the cookies "adhere" to them too much and crumble when you try and get them off of it. But the cookie sheet was perfect! (It's much thinner, but didn't warp at all.)

The old cookie press was, um, well, not my favorite product. But the new one is f-ing awesome. (And it doubles as a ricer too, so you can use it WAY more than you would a standard cookie press!) I want to try the chocolate cookies next week.

long week in Virginia

2009-08-20T12:42:31Z

Back from our road trip, we are missing all the people.....but thrilled to be back in our own beds! Yay! Jackson sleeps much better in the crib. And I love my TempurPedic so much I may start writing it love notes.

Anyway, it is SO hard to get back in the routine. But I am trying. Cooking club is tonight, so I have to get this place clean enough for company and quick. I have just had no energy to do it this week so far. I think my body is playing catch-up from all the walking we did last week.

so you sell insurance? but you know nothing ABOUT it? ah.

2009-07-29T04:12:33Z

So I had to talk to the guy who is supposed to be the "insurance guy" who knows "all about" the plans we can choose from. Yeah, right.

He was "pretty sure" that a homebirth with a midwife would not be covered. When I told him that it was covered in our current plan AND that Florida law demands that insurance companies cover it, he was surprised. Midwife?  What? What's that? (headdesk)

He had never heard of gap exception coverage and then suggested that if I got it for a midwife, she would be out-of-network. Which- hello?  Then why bother GETTING the gap exception?  You do that so they are covered as IN network. Um, pardon my lack of tact here, but DUH???

He also suggested that doctors are only supposed to take the co-pay for the first visit and then collect NOTHING until after the baby is born, deductible-wise. To which I LAUGHED IN HIS FACE! (Well, as much as you can do that over the phone.)  I dared him to find me ONE doctor who did not make you do a payment plan in which the full deductible is due by like your 7th month.

Ah, yes, this is the insurance "expert".

okay, so we have some anger issues in here?

2009-07-22T04:46:58Z

So I changed my default pic because, well, I am officially growing another person. Yay! (Not so yay for the nausea and other various symptoms that didn't present when I was pregnant with Jackson, but oh well.)

12 weeks and some change.

I am more than likely going for a homebirth....a VBAC with a midwife and a doula and YES in my house. Why? (Because I know many will ask.)

Well, because being pregnant isn't an illness, so it's not necessary to go to a hospital. Also? My experience with Jackson pretty much sucked ass. From beginning to end, the whole thing sucked and left me unable to breastfeed. (All the damn Pitocin- yes, 31 hours of it will pretty much override any natural form your body is supposed to produce and yes, I saw a lactation consultant and yes, I tried everything on her entire list.) My whole family got to see him before I did- when they finally brought him to me, he was two hours old and asleep. Did that affect our bonding? You bet your ass it did.

They lost his ID bracelet. They didn't take his picture in the hospital. And someone who WORKED there said to me something like "just wait til that baby's out" while I was pacing the halls of the RECOVERY area because I was told I needed to get up and walk AFTER the baby was born. (Yeah, you would think they would know what area they are in and that a woman's stomach area doesn't go completely flat after the baby is born. Especially with all the fluid they pumped into me...I was swollen ALL over for like a week or two. It was gross.)

Anyway, that's just some of it. So yes, I know people will think I am crazy for doing it. But just do me a favor and DON'T try to tell me how "dangerous" it can be. (Especially since if you are saying that, you have not done your research. Trust me- I have.)

playdates and naps

2009-07-09T21:50:48Z

How come they just don't seem to mesh well? Is it s a 2-year old thing? They get in such a play groove and you don't want to break it up and WHY WOULD YOU since you are getting some real adult conversation whilst the children are playing/throwing plastic food.

But then you realize that life has to return to normal and OMG you need to get home cause it is WAY past nap time. And then you get a snack once you're home cause you realize that the kids, while playing, didn't really touch any of the food offered. (Well, not enough.)

And you have a 1pm napper getting to sleep at 4pm and then oh crap you have to wake them at 6pm because you don't want them up all night but then they are cranky. And Mr Cranky Pants doesn't seem to go away very easily.

Is it terrible that you don't even care all that much that the kid is off schedule? Because I love me some full-fledged conversation....especially with someone I have not seen since my wedding FOUR YEARS AGO! Geez it was great to see Shannon....and Angie....that was awesome too! But I have not seen Shannon in forever and holy heck I miss her! We used to work together and if it wasn't for her, I would never have met my hubby! (And hence would not have this child....so really, he owes his very existence to her...being off schedule is a TEENY tiny price to pay.)

Ah, guilt absolved.

clean garage, messy house

2009-07-07T04:11:07Z

Well, it is a tradeoff.....we have a sparkly garage and a crap-tastic house now. Apparently, I only have the energy to handle one thing at a time. We may even skip the free movie tomorrow because we all may just need the sleep or lazy morning instead.

Today we were out at Alice's and had a grand time. We were there VERY late in the day and poor Jax was just exhausted. So tonight, we had a special visit from his alter-ego, Mr Cranky Pants.

While we had a great time, I got absolutely nothing accomplished. Which of course, I can't stand. I like to be productive. Maybe tomorrow I can clean and do the bank deposit and make PC calls and finish putting away all the garage stuff and do some laundry and plan Jackson's bday party and clean out my car. Maybe?

teh suxor

2009-07-04T04:18:54Z

Dude...we are cleaning out the garage. UGH! In JULY! Why did we not get this stupid compulsion, oh, I don't know....in JANUARY? When it felt GOOD outside?

Meanwhile the cars stay outside. Until we get it done.

grumble, razza-frazzin, grrrrr

Craig Ferguson is reading my mind

2009-07-02T18:56:36Z

We watch The Late Late Show weeks after it happens cause we are recording them and we don't watch it EVERY night, so we're a bit behind. BUT last night, we started watching the one where they are lip synching to "I'm Yours" by Jason Mraz.

Which has been playing virtually nonstop on my computer for the past week or so.

As soon as it started, I was SO HAPPY!

(Yes yes I know the whole world knows about the song and I bet it's been out for ages, but I didn't know who sang it and would only hear snippets on the radio and so I just bought it on iTunes a few weeks ago.)

I just freakin' love that song.

July already?

2009-07-01T20:08:13Z

I can hardly believe it's already July. The year is just flying by!

Meanwhile, I am waiting on home delivery of 3 books from the library....I've been waiting awhile, but that's to be expected with lots of books. Just checked my status....a few days ago, I was #5, 22, and 44, respectively, in line for my holds. Today, I am #5, 19, and 40. Sigh. Patience has never been my strong point.

clueless much?

2009-06-30T16:34:05Z

I was talking with a personal trainer and he was telling me about various workout programs he can tailor, etc. When talking about working out through various situations, he said that most women don't train while pregnant (um, gee- wonder why? Could it be cause of the extreme fatigue that makes even getting dressed an Olympic event?) and then they "gain 25 pounds and wonder what happened."

Hello????

25 pounds is pretty much the recommended weight gain.

And uh, for those of us who had gained, say, 40 pounds or more during pregnancy, well, you don't exactly sound like you know what you're talking about. Most women I know would have killed to have only gained 25 pounds. Dude is clueless.

new plan

2009-06-29T18:25:40Z

So I figured that I need to go back to having a daily plan. Similar to FlyLady but not exactly like that, as I know that didn't work for me long-term. I could follow it for like a month and then the backsliding would begin. Yuck! Yesterday I wrote out a plan that I thought I could probably do. And so far today, it has been working for me.

I did spend too much time online already, but habits are hard to break and Blue's Clues only lasts like 22 minutes, so that means I only went over by about 7 minutes. No biggie.

Today, the front room, kitchen and living room were vacuumed, I made a pitcher of tea, ran the dishwasher, have gotten through a few things on my to-do list and have eaten lunch. The way things have been going lately, this day already equals success even if NOTHING else gets accomplished.

closure

2009-06-28T03:36:37Z

So today I was driving along and had to go along a different route because there is construction. So I am driving along and I see a sign for "Greenwood Cemetery" and realize that this must be the place my Grandmother pointed to the other day when I was driving her home from a doctor's appt. (We were driving by the outside edge, not the entrance or any signage, so I didn't know how to get there based on her telling me that's where her husband and Mother were buried.)

Anyway, I turned the car around and just drove on in and asked where the family plots were and they showed me exactly where they were and I finally got to see my Grandfather's grave. Finally.

When he died, I was days away from turning 7 years old. I was told that I could not attend the funeral. I protested. But no....my Mom said I could not go. Now, it is my experience that kids have a concept of what they can handle. And really, if I couldn't take it, they could have had whoever was watching me at my grandparents' house drive me home, yes?

Granted, it was my first real brush with death. But this not being able to go really has stuck with me.

And I truly realized just how much today, when I was standing at his grave. I just started crying and saying my goodbyes. 25 years later. (I also cleaned off his marker, as it was completely buried under dirt and weeds.)

No one had ever taken me there or told me where he was buried. (Yes, I know that really I could have done some research, but it's not exactly at the forefront of a person's mind as they get older.)

It felt so good to get that out.

I also saw Annie Mae's grave (where someone planted an azalea- her FAVE plant) and all sorts of other family members. It was a bit creepy when they were looking up the names for me that they said "oh there are 5 spaces on this plot and one on the other one." He then told me who was slated for some of those spots. SO CREEPY! Apparently, my aunt will be buried with the Hoffners? (Her grandparents.) Then he said that I could go in there too, if I wanted to be cremated. Uh, yeah, just the conversation I wanted to have today. ODD!

place clever subject line here

2009-06-26T19:14:31Z

So yes, lots going on here. And yet, not much to talk about.

It's raining again. Celebs keep dying. (No one is reporting about Iran anymore because of FF and MJ.)

And OMG am I tired. Jackson got up at 4:30am. Then at 5am. Then at 6am. Then at 6:20am. WTF?!?!?!?!

four months later....

2009-06-25T19:22:45Z

Yeah, I know it's been four months since I did anything on this LJ. I don't even know if anyone else reads it anymore. But here I am. I am still alive. It's been so busy here and well, honestly, facecrack has totally taken over my free time on teh interwebs.

I do like having a blog, though. I am glad that I can come back to it and even look things up from ages ago.

Oddly, during my hiatus from writing here, I have also cut down on how many blogs I read, as well. Not really sure why that is, but there you have it.

Jackson will be TWO YEARS OLD in a few weeks and I just am amazed by that. He's in that great stage where you don't *always* understand what he's saying, but you can usually get the gist of it. He still listens to us, even when he doesn't want to.....like, when he's at the baby gate and someone has left it open, he starts to open it so he can walk through and I will say "close the gate" and he DOES even as he is pouting about it. He has not yet realized that he can be defiant. (Well, except when it comes to eating, but that was discovered by him AGES ago.)

Meanwhile, I am anxiously awaiting the release of the Harry Potter movie next month and hope that the WB doesn't decide at the last minute to screw us all once again. I mean, come on...the damn movie has been "in the can" for MONTHS! Whatever.

So that's it for now. Just for kicks- comment if you read it. Thanks!

CLUE!

2009-02-16T20:34:51Z

OMG, so now that Jackson is talking more, he is telling us what he wants more. Which is good.

For the past week, Kirk and I were both on-and-off sick, so that meant that Jackson got to see a fair amount of TV, which is not the norm.

So now, he walks up to the couch and says "cow" which means couch, meaning that he wants help getting on the couch. Once up on the couch, he says "CLUE" because he wants to see Blue's Clues. He seriously loves that show. He has done this little routine twice today! (And he will keep saying clue over and over and more insistently until you either distract him or turn on Blue's Clues.)